


these arms are made for holding you

by osakaspeach



Category: Given (Manga)
Genre: Canon Universe, Childhood Friends, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Introspection, Kinda?, M/M, Romantic Fluff, just lots of kisses but it's implied, they're in love that's it, they're literally boyfriends in canon and every other universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-13
Updated: 2019-09-13
Packaged: 2020-11-02 04:48:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20626958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/osakaspeach/pseuds/osakaspeach
Summary: A look at Yagi Shizusumi through the honey-colored lenses of Hiiragi’s eyes, and all the feelings and thoughts that come with it.





	these arms are made for holding you

**Author's Note:**

> hello, i'm just so soft for shizuragi and i love them so much. i had to write this after i watched episode 10 because i am so filled with love and softness and fluff for my two music boys. title was taken from one direction's "18" bc i was listening to that song while writing this and that line really made a mark on me and i thought it fits well.
> 
> anyway, watch & read given and stan shizuragi. that's all, ily.

For as long as he knew it, Yagi Shizusumi had always been a constant presence in his life. 

Hiiragi remembered not so little, but not so many either, of his childhood, but that little amount of memories he remembers vividly are the ones that matter: the day he transferred into the neighborhood and knocked on the door of the Yoshida household which led to him meeting the inseparable duo of Yuuki and Mafuyu, the day Shizusumi joined their group of three during their kindergarten days, the day when he first held a music instrument in his hand back in middle school, his whole being filled with determination and perseverance to learn, the day when he and Yuuki got piercings on their left ears just before high school officially started and a bit more in between those. 

Hiiragi doesn’t remember every detail of everything, but he remembers that in his 17 years of living in this world, Yagi Shizusumi had always been there and Hiiragi doesn’t remember a time when he wasn’t. 

It was as if he wasn’t conscious enough to live until Shizusumi came and shed light and warmth into Hiiragi’s life. 

Shizusumi’s hand is the hand he always held and pulled along whenever they run on the playground after school, the hand he holds and refuses to let go even when they don’t share the same umbrella when it’s raining, the hand he holds while they cross the street when they go home from school or go to the supermarket together with their parents, the hand he holds in the backseat of his parents’ car as they dozed off leaning against each other.

And when they grew older into the teenagers that they are now, Shizusumi’s hand is the hand that always pats his head and ruffles his hair as a sign of comfort whenever he worries a lot more than he should, Shizusumi’s hand is the hand that holds him tight when he breaks down into inconsolable tears and Shizusumi’s hand is the hand that pulls him out of the darkest recesses of his mind, of the nightmares caused by the past, of regrets and guilt and grief. 

Yagi Shizusumi was the sun of his own universe and Hiiragi revolves around him, drawn to his heat and to his light. Shizusumi is always there, shining brightly even in the darkest of the night, even when the skies are covered with the grayest clouds, even when the rain pours, the lightning strikes and thunder booms. 

And when he falls, Shizusumi is there to catch him and wrap strong but gentle arms around him, offering the simplest but most comforting words and the silence that followed is something that Hiiragi always basked in, because silent moments with Shizu-chan isn’t awkward and the most reassuring he had ever experienced. 

He could talk his ear out or sing music at the top of his lungs and Shizusumi would be there to listen to him and pay close and undivided attention to every word and every tune that flows from his lips. 

Hiiragi trusts Shizusumi with his life that he could blindfold himself and walk off a cliff and he’d be confidently and more than a hundred percent sure Shizusumi would be there at the bottom to catch him and secure him in his arms.

The thought of falling isn’t so bad, Hiiragi thinks, as long as it’s for Shizusumi, because there is no other place in this world that feels right, that feels like home than right in Shizusumi’s arms. 

\--

Hiiragi loves having Shizusumi’s arms around him, it makes him feel secure, but he also loves it just as much when he puts his arms around Shizusumi and lean against him because there is so much warmth in Shizusumi that never failed to make Hiiragi feel comfortable and safe. 

So it had been a habit to let their shoulders brush when they sit together in Hiiragi’s room to study, or to plop his head down on Shizu-chan’s lap or stomach after an intense study session while Shizusumi reads a book to relax, a free hand coming up to pet Hiiragi’s messy two-toned hair, lulling him to sleep. 

\--

Hiiragi knows that Shizusumi always kept his eyes on him, and even his sarcastic attitude can’t stop Shizusumi from seeing through him and the emotions that he keeps under wraps. Hiiragi could act like an asshole or a gremlin, but Shizusumi could still see the real emotions swimming behind honey-gold eyes. 

And he would always be waiting with his arms open for Hiiragi to fall into. 

That night when Yuuki died and Hiiragi had been a mix of guilt and regret and pain, and the nights that followed after. 

That night when he talked to Mafuyu again for the first time after the funeral and Hiiragi had been worrying a lot for the friend they all grew up with.

That night when Mafuyu sang and Hiiragi cried after talking to him, expressing how happy he was because Mafuyu sang. 

That night when they walked home after bumping into Mafuyu in the music store in Shibuya, Shizusumi offering the simplest but kindest and most sincere words that he knows Hiiragi would feel happy to hear even if he wouldn’t admit it. 

Shizusumi always had his rapt attention on Hiiragi and it’s the kind of attention that makes Hiiragi’s heart flutter in thanks and affection and the kind of attention that Hiiragi knows he doesn’t deserve but Shizusumi still gives him, whole-heartedly and without a tinge of doubt, because he trusts Hiiragi just as much as Hiiragi trusts him. 

Not everyone understands Hiiragi and the complexity of his personality but he doesn’t need everyone to understand him fully. He only needs one person to do so and he’s been doing a perfect job at it, at understanding the intricacies of Kashima Hiiragi and he thinks that that’s enough. Hell, Yagi Shizusumi is more than enough for someone like Kashima Hiiragi.

\--

Hiiragi had been in love with Yagi Shizusumi for as long as he could remember.

It wasn’t the sudden realization of waking up and finding out that you’re madly in love with your best friend since childhood. 

It was slow, and Hiiragi had his eyes opened every step of the way. He felt a different kind of warmth and affection envelope him little by little, his senses even more hyper-aware of everything that Shizusumi does, the fleeting brush of their fingers as they walked to school, the shoulders leaning against his during lunch, the hand that comes up to brush a lock of hair away because it covers his face, the chosen words that increasingly flustered him every day. 

The sight of Yagi Shizusumi and his dark brown hair that looked almost black but becomes the shade of chocolate underneath the sunlight, his forest green eyes that hold depths of understanding and affection directed towards Hiiragi, the lips that rarely curl up in a smile but when they do, Hiiragi thinks it’s the most beautiful sight he could capture in his mind. 

And one night when the moon is high up in the sky and the breeze blows coolly against his exposed skin, carrying the sound of Shizusumi’s laughter along with it in the brightly lit and busy streets of Shibuya, the sides of his eyes crinkling in delight and his forest green orbs shining brighter than the Tokyo citylights, Hiiragi realized that he is utterly and inexplicably in love with Yagi Shizusumi. 

\--

“Ask Shizu-chan out already. I feel bad for Shizu-chan you know?” was Mafuyu’s last words before he went off running towards his new boyfriend, a large and genuine smile on his face as he greeted the raven-haired guitarist of his new band. 

Hiiragi just sighed and ran a hand through his two-toned hair, a pout on his lips as he grumbled about Shizusumi being late once again. 

Not that he minds, he would wait for Shizusumi no matter how long it would take. 

When his best friend appears in his plain, dark blue yukata, Hiiragi just gave him the usual and almost fond, “Shizusumi, you’re late again,” and Shizu-chan would apologize sincerely every time. 

Hiiragi just waved him off and took his hand, pulling him along so they could make their way towards the shrine where the autumn festival would be held this year.

Walking around for a few hours, Hiiragi had obtained a goldfish that Shizusumi won for him because somehow he really can’t do it, and in exchange he bought Shizusumi a candy apple that he likes to get whenever they attend festivals, and matching kitsune masks that now hang by the side of their heads. 

When the time neared for the fireworks to start, Hiiragi pulled Shizusumi along the grassy part near the lake so they could have a nice, unobstructed view. 

Fireworks had always been Shizusumi’s favorite part of the festival so Hiiragi had always been dedicated to finding a good spot for them to enjoy the show. 

They engaged in small talk while consuming the food they bought from the festival booths, discussing about their upcoming live show and contest, talking about new album releases of their favorite plans, school homework and all those stuff that Hiiragi finds hard to understand so he asked Shizusumi for help and like always, Shizusumi agreed. Then they basked in the silent comfort offered by each other’s presence. 

The crowd thickens around them and so they had to move closer, the constant heat that surrounds Shizusumi expanding towards Hiiragi, making him feel warm in the increasingly cold Tokyo nights. 

Then bursts of colors started to light up the sky, painting it in yellows and greens and pinks and blues and a whole lot more, exploding in vibrancy and variety, the sound filling the suddenly hushed people-filled space as everyone silently admired and watched in awe. 

Hiiragi turned to look at Shizusumi, because he always loved how Shizusumi looked with the different colors that litter the sky kiss his fair skin, a peaceful and relaxed look on his face as he watched. 

But this time, when he turned to look at him, Shizusumi was already looking at him, with that deep affection swimming in his eyes that makes Hiiragi’s cheeks go warm as he felt the blush coming up, that makes Hiiragi’s heart clench so painfully good inside his chest because he loves this man so much, and he knows, god he _ knows _ that Shizusumi loves him too, and the depth of that love is something Hiiragi knows he doesn’t deserve but Shizusumi was still all too willing to give and shower him with. 

He didn’t even notice a tear slip down his cheek until Shizusumi shuffled a bit closer to wipe it away, their lips only a few centimeters apart from each other. Shizusumi pressed his forehead against his, the hand that wiped away his tear placed gently on his cheek and caressing the skin with his thumb, and Hiiragi laughed softly, “I don’t deserve you.” 

“I don’t deserve _ you. _” 

“Because you deserve more than just me.” 

“What could be wrong with you?” Shizusumi asked, “You’re smart, talented, passionate, genuinely caring and concerned for other people, especially for your friends and your family, you know what you want and you put in all the effort you can to get it, you’re _ you, _you’re Kashima Hiiragi, there’s nothing better or nothing more than you because you’re all I need and want.” 

Yagi Shizusumi has a way with words. He doesn’t speak a lot like Hiiragi or Yuuki do (back when he was still… around), but when he does, his words mean a lot, frank but not rude, sincere and honest, said with the deep but gentlest voice Hiiragi had ever come to hear, and they reverberate through his whole being. Shizu-chan has a way with words that Hiiragi can’t exactly explain but every time, he makes Hiiragi want to believe. 

And Hiiragi does believe, because he trusts Shizu-chan and Shizu-chan wouldn’t say anything insincere and untrue just to spare his feelings. 

Also, Shizusumi is right. Hiiragi knows what he wants and he would do anything to get it, and he wants to kiss Shizusumi, and hold his hand and call him his boyfriend, and even though right now, he still doesn’t deserve him, he would continually work harder to be the man that Shizusumi rightfully deserves. 

“Well, when you say it like that, I have no choice but to believe you.” Hiiragi chuckled, “Hey, Shizu-chan, can I kiss you?” 

Even through the loud explosions vibrating in the air, Hiiragi heard the soft intake of breath that Shizusumi took, felt the exhale on his lips as Shizusumi answered breathily, “Yes,” and then lips were on his and his heart echoed the fireworks exploding against the night sky. 

Nothing else mattered right now except for this moment he shared with Yagi Shizusumi, his bestest friend and the love of his life.

Hiiragi can’t help the giddy smile that appeared on his face when he and Shizusumi pulled back only for him to lean his head on Shizusumi’s shoulder, can’t help the urge to move closer and intertwine their fingers as they walked back to his house, can’t help but want to lie closely with him and appreciate the beautiful features of Shizusumi’s face, bathed under the moonlight as they lay together in silence of Hiiragi’s bedroom, can’t help but kiss every part of Shizusumi’s face he could reach because he can do it now, can’t help but say, “I love you” as he stared intensely at his favorite set of forest green eyes. 

Shizusumi’s eyes soften and he pressed yet another kiss on Hiiragi’s lips, and Hiiragi thinks he could grow addicted to this much more intimate affection between the two of them. 

“I love you, Hiiragi.”

But Hiiragi doesn’t think he could ever get used to Shizusumi saying that with his wonderful voice and his sincere expression and loving gaze. 

So he shifts closer and buries his face on Shizusumi's chest, his arms encircling his waist, as he felt his ears heat up when he heard Shizusumi chuckle fondly at his flustered reaction. 

Then Shizu-chan placed his arms around him and kissed the top of his head, and Hiiragi relaxed in his hold like he always does, knowing that right in the arms of Yagi Shizusumi is his safest place in the world. 

**Author's Note:**

> how to: write a good ending?? i surely don't know lmao thank you for reading!!


End file.
